Some people eat to live, but I live to eat. True story. I love food so much that it consumes my mind almost every second I can get. The last thing I think about before I fall asleep every night is what I will eat for breakfast, and when I wake up the first thing I think about is what I will have for lunch and of course, dinner. I just cannot stop thinking about food!
I’m not a picky eater. I’ll try everything at least once. A few years ago when I was dating a Russian I came over her families’ house for dinner, and they served me cow tongue. True story. With a little help from some A1 sauce though, I was good to go. I ate that night until my stomach ballooned, and I wasn’t able to breathe. That’s the best feeling in the world. The feeling of fulfillment.
My obsession with food probably comes from the fact that I know I can eat anything I want, because my job is the gym. Every Monday thru Friday I’m “Personal Trainer of the Year” at Glendale Gym and Fitness. I have the largest cliental at the gym, and the list keeps on growing, just like my appetite.
I’ve set up a routine. After every session I have I go into my office, slightly close the door to wear off any suspicion, and dive into my bag for a surprise treat. I like to keep my day exciting; I throw in a variety of different candy bars into my bag, so with every draw it’s something new. Since my favorite is the Twix bar, I know it’s going to be a good day if I get a Twix on my first draw. They come rarely, but when they it’s like God’s little treat.
No one at work knows that I’m addicted to food. They know I love food, but come on, who doesn’t? They just don’t know the extent of how much I love it. They probably wouldn’t do anything if they ever found out, but I would prefer keeping this under wraps, because honestly, I’m kind of embarrassed.
I haven’t been like this all my life, just as soon as I got my certificate in personal training. I figured going all out once in a while won’t kill me; after all, I’ll work it off, but then it gradually went from once in a while to all of the time.
I’ve recently came to the conclusion that food is better than sex. True story. I guess that would explain why my book bag is filled with snacks and not condoms. Instead of checking out women when I’m walking down the street or at work, I check out the fresh loaves of bread on display at bakeries. Nothing does it like warm bread.
I get asked out on many dates at work. I don’t know what it is about women and a guy with muscles, but they are drawn to us. If I were them I’d draw myself onto a nice piece of juicy steak instead, but that’s just me.
Sometimes when I read about a great restaurant that I have not yet been to I decide to take a woman up on her offer, and go on a date with her. This way I get to go to the restaurant, and not eat alone. The dates never go well, though. I am usually so intrigued by the food that I ignore her. I always feel awful about it, but I can’t help it, I love food.
Looking at me no one would think twice about my eating habits, hell, before today I was in denial myself. Five hours of exercise, five times a week and I thought I was fit to go, but, it’s time to confess. Hi, I’m Jake and I’m a food addict. True story.
